Math Jokes

Q: What do you get if you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter?

A: Pumpkin pi


An engineer thinks that his equations are an approximation to reality. A physicist thinks reality is an approximation to his equations. A mathematician doesn't care.


Old mathematicians never die; they just lose some of their functions.


Mathematicians are like Frenchmen: whatever you say to them, they translate it into their own language, and forthwith it means something entirely different. -- Goethe



Mathematics is the art of giving the same name to different things. -- J. H. Poincare


Algebraic symbols are used when you do not know what you are talking about.


Mathematics is like checkers in being suitable for the young, not too difficult, amusing, and without peril to the state. (Plato)



The difference between an introvert and extrovert mathematicians is: An introvert mathematician looks at his shoes while talking to you. An extrovert mathematician looks at your shoes.


An chemist, a physicist, and a mathematician are stranded on an island when a can of food rolls ashore. The chemist and the physicist comes up with many ingenious ways to open the can. Then suddenly the mathematician gets a bright idea: "Assume we have a can opener ..."



Q: Why did the 30-60-90 triangle marry the 45-45-90 triangle?
A: They were right for each other



Q: Why didn't the Romans find algebra very challenging?
A: Because X was always 10



Q: Why couldn't the angle get a loan?
A: His parents wouldn't Cosine



Q: Why is beer never served at a math party?
A: Because you can't drink and derive.



Q: Why didn't the number 4 get into the nightclub?
A: Because he is 2 square




Q. Why was the math book sad?
A. Because it had so many problems.




Q: What is a bird's favorite type of math?
A: Owl-gebra




Q: Why did the obtuse angle go to the beach?
A: Because it was over 90 degrees



Q: Why do plants hate math?
A: Because it gives them square roots.




Q: What is the first derivative of a cow?
A: Prime Rib!




Can you recite pi? Yes! Apple, cherry, blueberry...





What do you get when you take a bovine and divide its circumference by its diameter? A cow pi.




If you ask a scientist what pi is, he'll tell you it equals 3.14159. If you ask a mathematician, he'll tell you pi equals the circumference of a circle divided by its diameter. If you ask an engineer, he'll say "Pi? Well, it's about 3, but we'll call it 4 just to be safe." But if you ask a kid, he’ll ask if he can have ice cream with it.




Why does nobody talk to circles? Because there is no point!




Why did the two 4’s skip lunch? A: They already 8!